I’m done. done. done. done! SO EXCITED about it. I still have anxiety over getting my grades back. but what’s done is done. I returned my and paul’s books today and cleaned the house so we can get a fresh start without the chaos of the mess created by finals. I’m going to sort my closet a second time to try and find a few more things to get rid of. I can’t wait to sell much of my stuff! I want a fresh start and building myself healthy. I’m not looking forward to going home tonight though. Paul and I have been arguing about him and his allergies and work. and it always ends up being my fault because i’m not as stuborn as he is and I give in to the guilt/pressure. hate that. 

hating school. can it be over now?

final at 8am tomorrow that I have to ace to get a good grade in the class.

working til midnight tonight.. about to have a meltdown.

working 10:45 to 8pm tonight at the library.. awful! I am am avoiding working my teacher work sample, ie. a fifty page document a need to write by Friday about my pre-student teaching placement this semester. I have been productive though today thus far! I shelved an EMC cart which took 45 minutes. yes, it was painful. I balanced our checkbook. I finished a worksheet for assessment. facebooked. browsed pinterest.. okay, so I haven’t been that productive. but I’ve been a whole lot more productive than i was yesterday! but I enjoyed yesterday so I can’t complain. I’m trying to think about summer and get past my fears and insecurities about it all. i need to be more outgoing and not live in the cave that i have been. I place way to much time and energy worrying about what other people think and I need to stop that! plus, for the majority of the people, I hardly think they care what I do so why should I care what they do. [I feel myself going into a long rant so I’ll stop myself now] I debated if I should make a new blog for myself or stick with this.. but in the end I decided to stick with this one. I unfolllowed everyone that i had been following- so I’m starting fresh. I just want to use this summer to build my confidence and happiness in myself, because school has been really draining for my recently. it’s just school and work that consume my life. I need to discover new passions. It’s my last summer before I have a big girl job next year and i’ll be consumed preparing my first classroom- that’s how i got the new title. Time is really running low in my college career.. (& trust me, I’m so glad for that! )